California Law Business

Criminal Defense Attorney by Day, Stand-up Comedian
by Night, Kenny Kahn Keeps His Schticks Straight

By Pearl J. Piatt

What do you call an attorney with an I.Q of 47? "Your honor," jokes Kenny Kahn, attorney cum comedian.

A criminal defense attorney by day, Kahn has spent his nights pursuing a second career as a stand-up comic ever since he signed up with a comedy workshop two years ago. Appearing in court and doing stand-up comedy are as different as night and day, he says. "When you're up there doing comedy, if an audience doesn't laugh, you've just lost," he says. "In front of a jury, you have to wait until the whole case has been heard and you could still lose the case and still do a good job."

For Kahn, every topic is fair game - especially jokes about lawyers. "I hold our whole criminal justice system up to the ridicule it so richly deserves," he says. "I do a lot of material about the system, about judges, about lawyers, about cops, about inmates."

However, Kahn's life has not always been filled with laughter. He says his parents were heroin junkies and "carnies," running rigged games at carnivals and fairs. And when he was young, he traveled with carnivals during the summer, "I figured out ways to pry sticky quarters out of kids' hands," he says. "By the time I was 12, I knew a hundred ways to steal a dollar."

During the school years, he grew up in the county housing projects in East Los Angeles. He says he had to climb over local junkies shooting up in his bathroom on the way to do homework in his bedroom. Adding to the tragedy in his life, Kahn contracted nonparalytic polio when he was 15.

"My life stunk," he says. "I had this horrible childhood. I could see the only key to escape was education. So I became an education junkie." He stuck with his studies all the way through law school. "I was looking for something to do with my life and I never did find it, so I ended up taking the LSAT," he cracks.

In 1965 he received his J.D. from Boalt Hall and landed a job with the Los Angeles Public Defenders Office after graduation. His job choice, oddly enough, was influenced by his father. "I got to feel very comfortable with criminals," he says. "My dad was a professional criminal, a petty thief. My father thought it took too long to become a lawyer. He had crimes to be committed and he couldn't wait that long." Although he says he never defended his father, he often represented his parent's friends, who were "petty thieves and hookers."

After two years with the Public Defenders Office, he joined the Long Beach Legal Aid Foundation. A few years later, he decided to enter private practice. "I wanted to see what private practice was like," he says. "I wanted to be my own boss." Kahn says its difficult to make a living doing private practice defense work. However, he was able to carve out a practice early on "by virtue of the times in which I lived," referring to popular anti-war activities during the "hippie" era. He counseled draft-dodgers, conscientious objectors and people who tore up their draft cards. "There were times the law was cracking down on people who were not really criminals," he says. "This is during the anti-war era where people were getting busted for ridiculous stuff like assembling where they shouldn't, marching where they shouldn't, and getting busted out of the love-ins in the park."

Since then, his legal career has hit many highs and lows. He has represented several famous clients, including entertainer Ike Turner and Larry Flynt, publisher of Hustler magazine. In 1983, Kahn represented Flynt during his contempt hearing for wearing the American flag as a diaper to court. Flynt was making the point that "we have freedom of expression unless they don't like what you are expressing," says Kahn, who says he never received payment from Flynt for that case. Calling it a "seamy and tawdry episode," Judge Stephen Reinhardt of the 9th US Circuit Court of Appeals vacated Flynt's contempt sentences, which totaled 15 months. United States V Flynt, 756f.2d 1352 (1985)

He also represented Dalton Lee in the 1977 notorious espionage case upon which the book "The Falcon and the Snowman" was based. Lee had been charged with helping friend Christopher J. Boyce, sell classified documents to the Soviets. Lee was sentenced to life in prison for espionage. Kahn later sued Orion pictures for his own portrayal in the movie, receiving a "substantial" settlement for his libel suit. Kahn v Orion Pictures, C536079. He objected to scenes in the 1985 movie that show Kahn encouraging Lee to exchange information on drug suppliers in exchange for reduced sentence and helping him escape to Mexico.

He says he has even been on "Oprah" - opposite Alan Dershawitz, speaking about the role of the defense lawyer in America. However, Kahn has suffered drawbacks and even danger during his career. In 1987, Kahn was stabbed in the chest with an ice pick wielded by a client in court. His client, John Proudfoot, was about to be sentenced for assaulting six police officers. "He nicked the liver and missed the heart by three quarters of an inch," says Kahn. "I didn't realize what had happened until I was in the emergency room. I felt no pain and didn't know I had just had a brush with death." Even though people thought he was crazy, Kahn continued to represent Proudfoot after the stabbing. "I don't abandon my clients for any reason," he says emphatically. Kahn believed Proudfoot stabbed him because he had not taken his medication. "He had never exhibited any anger toward me before," he says. Proudfoot was sentenced to three years in prison for assaulting police officers and an additional five years for stabbing Kahn.

Khan has also butted heads with the District Attorney's Office. In 1993, he was prosecuted for handing out flyers outside the courthouse. The flyers advertised his defense practice - LA Defenders which was formed in 1991. "The DA was concerned poor people would get proper representation," says Kahn. Lisa Kaas, deputy district attorney, says there were numerous complaints from judges and court personnel about the "aggressive behavior" of the people handing out flyers. She says the suit was resolved when Kahn signed a stipulated final judgment, agreeing to stop passing out the flyers.

After 30 years in criminal defense, Kahn decided to explore stand-up comedy as a second career. "Enough is enough," he says. "It's time to move on in life, you can't do one thing your whole life." His career began two years ago when he enrolled in a six week comedy workshop that culminated in a showcase at Igby's Comedy Club in Los Angeles. That first routine lasted seven minutes, but "seemed like an eternity." He says Igby's liked him so much they asked him back as an independent. Kahn feels his foray into stand-up has been successful. "I'm told that my success over the last couple of years is unprecedented," Kahn says. "Somebody being in the business such a short period of time and having the kind of success I have had is unheard of."

Onstage, Kahn is armed with a seemingly endless supply of quips. He has something to say about everything, and nothing is sacred. "People who come to my show know that it's going to be an iconoclastic deluge," he says. "They know I am totally irreverent. I take nothing seriously and the things I take most seriously are the things I make fun of."

When asked about the death penalty, he responds, "I'm absolutely opposed to the death penalty except in cases of graffiti." He says this joke gets a laugh from everyone "except the ones with spray cans in their pockets." And of course, he has an opinion about the O. J. trial. "O. J. is absolutely 100% not guilty," he says. "Apparently the only 12 people in America who believe that were on the jury. But it is nice that O. J. is out looking for the real killer, and if that guy happens to be on the 18th green, O. J. will find him."

He admits his comedy routine is sometimes a soapbox from which he expresses his more unconventional views. "I can't do it in a direct way - like having a rational discussion on what our policies are and how the justice system works - because no one gives a damn, to tell the truth," he says. "But if you make them laugh, they'll listen to anything." What's his favorite rant? One of several is "judges who are soft on crime - there are none," he says. "This is all baloney that was made up by some right wing manufacturing establishment." What's more, he calls the criminal justice system an oxymoron. "From my observation, we systematically lock up people who are minorities," he says. "We lock up people who have no money. It's an issue of how much justice you can afford in America."

Despite his liberal views he eschews the liberal label. "I'm way to the left of that," he jokes. "I don't support the Democrats and I certainly don't support the Conservatives. I have my own take on the world. As far as I'm concerned, all politicians belong in the same category as the girls that worked for Heidi Fleiss." He knows his opinions are sometimes inflammatory. "I'm not out for popularity," he replies. "We have a rich history of people who are political commentators. Go back to Will Rogers, to Lenny Bruce, to Mort Sahl. They are people who are critics of our system, our way of life, our politics and of us as people. I think there is a tradition here."

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